2020 has been a year of video-meetings. That is the gift of COVID-19 pandemic. Now, all of a sudden, everyone wants a Zoom meeting. It is the norm. For all of us so used to face to face meetings, video-meeting was a zooming transition. Who said humans hate change?
Face to face meetings served several purposes. You could focus on the persons on the table, see them and hear them. You could read their body language and tell if they mean what they say. Face to face meetings have been great occasions to build business relationships. They helped us focus our full attention on other participants on the table.
But with these video meetings, there is always an extra person on the screen. And you tend to focus on that person more often.
That person is YOU.
If you one of those who often have back to back meetings, you are looking at yourself for hours. Most people cannot ignore the other YOU on the screen. It is also tempting to compare oneself with the rest on the screen.
When you look at the screen, are you feeling that you are the smartest person around? The real problem starts if you go one step further and start admiring yourself. That may be a sign of narcissism!
With so much video-meetings, has the pandemic created a world of narcissists?
Where do you stand?
The simplest definition of narcissism is an excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one’s physical appearance. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is characterized by a long-standing pattern of grandiosity (either in fantasy or actual behavior), an overwhelming need for admiration, and usually a complete lack of empathy toward others.
The good news is that you are unlikely to be a narcissist. According to Psychology Today, only one per cent of the population are narcissists. Besides, there is a type of narcissism that is considered healthy. Psychology Today says that healthy narcissism enables us to have confidence and self-investment to succeed. Research shows that due to high self-esteem, narcissists maintain a sense of well-being with low levels of depression, anxiety, and loneliness.
So, it is also fine to be a little narcissistic, as long as it is within the limits of healthy narcissism.
Challenges beyond narcissism
Video meeting offers a few challenges beyond narcissism. A good meeting requires your undivided attention on the proceedings. But your very presence on the screen can divert your attention. It can be a problem if you keep rolling your eyes to look at yourself rather than concentrating on the other participants.
You can also argue that the tendency to look at your own picture is natural. After you take a selfie with a group, what do you look at first? Of course, your image. That tendency stays in a video meeting as well.
Besides, video meetings may be recorded. So, the video can capture all your errors and mannerism for the posterity. The real risk is what lawyers call the discovery risk. What you say in the conference can be used as evidence in the courts of law.
Improve your video-conferencing skills
Video-conferencing is an essential skill. Here are the ways of improving your videos conferencing skills.
1. Turn off video: Turning off your video is probably the simplest solution. After the introductions, you can do it with the permission from other participants. However, if other participants would like to see everyone on the video, turning off your video is not an option. If that happens, you can choose to have only the other participants on your screen. You can also minimize the video, even when you are speaking.
2. Follow the Company Policy on Video Meetings: Some companies have developed policies on video meetings. The system may require that the participants are informed, and their consent obtained for recording a session. So please take note of the policy and adhere to it.
3. Mind your manners: As the video conferencing records everything you do in the meeting, please conduct yourself well during the session. Video captures gestures, tone and energy level (or the lack of it) and every word you said (or did not say).
4. Prepare, Prepare and Prepare: You can create a positive impact through video conferencing. It can also create problems if you are not well prepared. The video-conferencing system captures everything you say and do during a meeting. For example, in case the sales negotiations fail, your supervisor may want to review the video footage to find out what went wrong. So, prepare very well for every meeting.
Remember, you are not the only one facing these challenges. It affects everyone in the meeting equally.
